holy shit!

i never knew looking for places would be difficult!


(Source: sirensonthewater)


(Source: highborn)


(Source: iraffiruse)

Shitz and giggles! telling my mom how i swallowed my piercing!

smellslikegodsvagina:

igotadonkk:

Mom: como te lo tragaste? ( how did you swallow it?)

Me: i was eating a corn dog..

Mom: un condon? ( a condom?)

Me: hahahahahahahahahahahaha no mom a CORN DOG

Mom: oh ok, yah te entiendo. ( ok i understand)

shes got high expectations of you

i know right  i was laughing my butt off! i was no mother i havent done that!


You are fulfilling every woman’s wildest fantasies
You are the husband that they never had
You are that dream guy that never came along

(Source: palmhardy)